Later that Day

That was sure a ramble.

So I went back early and roomy wasn't there either. All seemed so bad when I couldn't get into the bathroom and dreaded talking to the CA, but once I got myself together to go do it, it wasn't so bad. Actually it was even nice. Who knew. Things have a way of never appearing or happening you expect it.


And it just hit me again when I was looking up NeYo and ran into NeYo - Miss Independent ha. It's a sign?


She got her own thing That's why I love her


And here's another one it was just the other day when I realize what they were saying O.A.R. - Shattered.


How many times can I break till I shatter.


I'm not really tired right now. But I should try to get some rest. I am so tempted, but I don't want to be a bother. So not today. Give it a rest. Give myself a break and chance. Plus funny scope said nothing of it. Maybe like Shinae said, it's a sign from God. But this does make the decesion to go home much easier. As long as there is no reason to stay, I shall go. I already have been shattered once and it took a long time to put myself together or maybe I haven't really put myself together really. Maybe I am just barely holding on. I am broken. But I will make do with what I have. See so many songs today. One for every mood and emotion.

So just talked to Lulu and still deciding if I should. Funny that she didn't get my call. But either way. It's the feeling of missing someone that hurts. I really do need to not grow so attached. I really can't beleive a thing or most things he saids. It's just like noodle. Say things just to make you happy. But keep in mind not everyone is like you. There's always some truth in what I way, the root of it is always true. So much writing today. So many thoughts. I do feel a wee bit better. One day is already so hard. Imagin if I fall any deeper. But knowing the feelings are not returned it saddens me.

But I love you just because I do. Just because you are, for being you. Even if it's all a lie. Thanks for a lovely dream. Thanks for the memories, that's for sure. Thanks for making me so happy even if it wasn't real, thanks for trying. Thanks for the good times and the bad. Thanks for showing me the way.

People are really like songs. At first you can't get enough of them. And then you can't image lie without them and spend as much time with them over and over again. So much that you get sick of them. They become boring and predictable. Then you spend less time with them and then soon the slightest thought of it makes you sick. Is there a way around it? Or is it all invetable? But there are always new songs. But can there be a song where you will always remain loyal to? It's not like I haven't thought this through. I know the cycle. It will end the same way. So enjoy the ride. Have fun. Make memories as Miss Frizzel said. (I'm surprised that it's actually right)

I look around me and I see people working so hard. I can't seem to work as hard as they do. Although I try to and I appear to be. But it just doesn't seem to be as effective. Even tonight, hour turns into 2 hours and what for? I take this time to self reflect. I promise you in the morning it be a new day.