Just Push

I just went with the first image that gave me any feeling. Scope just poped up and said { How uncanny that he/she feels the same way.. } If that was so, then I got something to work on then. Whenever you are in a bind, can always cound on Simple Plan - Your Love is a Lie to get you out ^^ But what are the chances called twice, left a massage once and nothing? Well it's not like it has not happened before. Well no matter. Eh is not as innocent as eh looks. One must always becareful not to be used. Nothing worng with helping people out, just on your own inicitive and accord. Not because you were manipulated. So no matter the result, you know you did it because you wanted to. Nothing more.

I really don't feel like working on Eviews now, but I know I really have been putting it off for a long time now. And speak of the Devil. Had an interesting talk with eh. Something about liars. So sia sum is attention to details or sensative? Or maybe it's a wee bit of both. It really is funny how one call changes everything. But do I beleive eh? But do take note that talking to em does tend to go too long. At least longer than expected. *sigh* so do hate what eh does to me, drives me insain.

Good Lessons are Thoughest to Learn

I can feel anger and frustration setting in. But then I start to think about the one over the summer and I catch myself trying to explain to him how to love one else. And I find myself needing the same lesson. To let go and to learn the lesson. (I was going to use a different one but I can't find the imagin your pain one, so this shall do)

This weekend was Turkey weekend and it truely was a Black Friday. All the disapline and what I have worked for all seemed to go right out the door this weekend. The greed and the need all took over and ran rampant through my life. I could feel it taking a hold of me.. I really need to do a quick reset and calm the mind. I bought so much and to what end? Oh the greed and the wanting of more and more. Ending up buying two pairs of shoes and then a jacket that I really chouldn't have, but did anyways because the need was so strong. Bad bad. When I should be content with what I already have. And that one applys to everything. Including with relactionships of any kind.

I think I need to go decluter for a bit. Everything is tempary, it can never fill the void that's in me. I want to get back to looking for icons and photography again. That was always fun. It was where it all started kind of more or less where the road the Hell started.

I am starting to feel a wee bit better now.

• Thanks.

Awful Drained as a Used Tea Bag

I am really tired. But yesterday finally got marketing book back and also a bunch of notes too which were so nice I got to admit. And the smilie face added character too which was cute and sweet. I know I have fallen for em. But I will be careful. It was worth it after all even if this was all I ever get. It was well worth it if I can get a decent grade on the test, but we shall see.

Since last night I have had 3 hours of sleep. So very tired. But somehow things worked out more or less. I am not sure. I mean I know I did miss Phil over talking to Barb, but it was for a very selfish reason. I know it was worng. I don't know what I was trying to get at but I know it was for my own cruel intensions. But maybe that's how things are to be. But not for a class when it's so close. I know I ill end up kicking myself if I missed it over attendance. Had my meeting with Sarah. I knew she was smart but not that smart with a 4.0 gpa omg.. now I feel stupid. At least I got her age right that's she's late 20's and turns out she's 29. So I hit that one. E-board meeting was quick was OTM, then Business Meeting didn't happen because of the 6 CA's getting canned. So that worked out. Then eh called and meh called. Although didn't get eh's paper to look over, did get to talk about issues that I know do bother him. It's all about uncertainity. Need to find a way to reduce it. It's his insercurties that affect me and make me worry. But eh did say I dun have to worry because I'm American. But that has nothing to do with spending how much time in school.

And the things I have to do still. Zero expectations..

• Print out craps
• Churn out graphs
• Research credit default swap

True Love.. and compasion.

True Love

I been reading Ajahn's book on true love. It's not what they make it out to be like in the movies. It's to love unconditionally. No matter what. I wonder how you learn that. I can try though. To love anyways and to expect nothing. To leave the door to my heart open to you at all times, no matter what hour of the day it is.

So the weekend passes like every other weeken except this weekend I truely got nothing done. Had eh come over just for a day and spend the day wandering around with em looking for sale items. I actually was hoping that after being around eh, would be able to find more flaws in em and that will be that. But that wasn't the case =.= first thing was eh had the same kitty collection... and have the same freaky taste in wierd things like coats, chocolates, and crystals... so get back and help em move craps to have em flip on the tv to the Discovery channel.. I don't know if I should laugh of cry.

Suddenly I feel like cream cheese.

Beside the point. I will leave things be and watch things in the side like a movie. The negatives I can think of now is the tag switching. But besides that, only to learn more positive things about em... sad sad.

Was just on youtube and it's funny now they got the wide screen thing going now. I got half of the book read. But I need to contatntly remind myself that I love all the same, no more or less, but I need to love myself as well. I can never forget about my self.

Okay, so how is it I am worng as usual? But eh is just stressed about accounting. Really do just need to trust em. Be understanding.

=)

(Oh such a smexy advertisment pose) It's all I can say. First malay pulled through and at least showed up. I got some hot choco and a cookie. The cookie made my tummie a little rummblie, but it's all good. Then won Red Lobster gife card woo. Then to check email to find out the econ assin has been pushed back to next week omgz. So it means more time to work on my research for other classes. And pretty much the only low point of today was eh didn't pick up as usual =.= that loser bum. But it seems to always have a some what good excuse. I won't let you down. I will truely do my best and be understanding.

Uriel

I am in so much pain. Maybe it's all stress pain. But I am starting tog et back into Big Bang, but it's not helping me do much for I feel like I have gotten nothing done. Looking at econ is driving me nuts already. Hopefully tomorrow things will look more clear.

Supernatural was good. Oh my smexy angel. He has that cool smothering look that is to die for. But first my ankle is in pain and now left shoulder. I don't know what to do about it. But I feel like I should just cut my losses and pack it up for the day. Get some rest and hopefully tomorrow will be more productive. No, not hopefully. It will be. I will make sure it is.

I really can't be so stingy on the printing. If you really need it then print the crap out. It will all be taken care of. So please get som rest and some peace.

I'm so Sorry but I Love You

..but I love you more..

Manglish really is the same as Singlish. Really so does sound like em. It's freaky and made me think of em. And then I come across Big Bang - Lies. Presentation is not too much of a concern. It will all be over before I know it as long as I got some of the enouncation figured out. If I knew better I should have switched it, I mean fliped the slides around. But there's no learning in doing anything easy. But was it him or was it someone else? Well from what Palacco saids, he said it was someone else. But he seemed confused. Even if it was him, it wouldn't matter. He seems alright. Acceptable. As long as he does his own part. Maybe it's time for me to visit Malaysia? keke. And Seven it so yummies too. No matter, focus. Now to decide to help or not. I should go check it out anyways.

Peace and Happiness

How free you are when you lose things. The delusion of control. omg the other day I was all delusional and there it is again. her hair is nice. I was something like that. A work in progress. A reflection of what has concurred today. I think I scrwed up my assignment. I am sure I have to process correct, but the numbers are not churning out properly. Besides that, looking at econ freaks me out. But I will have to look at it either way and just try before I end up kicking myself later. I found some colorful construction paper today. I am not sure where it's from. It was laying (ha see one of my blogs were actually useful =P) on the edge of the recyling bin. So colorful, so nice, so simple. I like it. reminds me of simplier times. I think things are really that simple, it's just everyone is making things out to be more complicated than they are. It's a perception that easy and simple things are not worth doing. It's only the ... and my train of thought was disturbed by an email from someone that was no help at all. But I welcome all and any kind of help. You know this is one of thoes times that I can worry all I want and think all I want and yet I can't do anything. I can only wait for the situation to change. It's always changing. Wait till the time is right.

So I am going to be busy sending email tonite. I just noticed that I don't get any emails on the school email. It's finny. Maybe they got a really good filter. Relax and sit and not try so dam hard to change the world and let it be. I will trust them. I am looking and econ and I don't seem to be getting anywhere.

If I were a Boy

Maybe I done enough for one day and deserve a rest for tonight. okay can't say I didn't try to look for the prof on facebook =P It's kind of chilly in this room. Well I would have cc his a copy of the emails, but what's his face had to add in the comments about me. So I decided not to. Am I really fine without you? I really want to be. It's taking its toll on me. Have to let em all go. It's truely is Delusional. But what's really rediculious is that prof didn't even know who was the one that talked to him or the one that's helping out. Moe Lou Sum. Guess eh is not the only one. I noticed the same thing about the prof. But what's he up doing so late? Oh ick I just imagined prof in his undies or something lol But at least he's timely to respond unless you know who *hint hint* And they were not even that dark and the oder was just intoxicating. This chair hurts, not so comfortable.

And what am I waiting for? Seems all so useless. But it's not for me to say. And oh I just ador this kitty. Gotta love Disney. Now I am starting to feel physical pain. Who knows what's going on with them all today. Why you must punish yourself? Goodness it's almost 1 again. Guess I would want to go before it gets too late again. Oh well. You know what? If it mattered, I wouldn't be in this situation.
If I were a boy, wouldn't it be nice. Just think about myself. Be selfish for once. No matter what you but yourself through no one else would know or care. You are only punishing yourself. Head is really itchy, really gotta wash it.

I am really done playing. Please let me go.

Delusional

I was continplating whether if I should help or not but I don't want to get a choice out of ill will. No need for revenge. Delusion. Not sure why but I really like the hair in this one. But I don't think I got the hairline for it. But it never hurts to try.

A delusion is commonly defined as a fixed false belief and is used in everyday language to describe a belief that is either false, fanciful or derived from deception.

Karma will get the bastard. It's the one of the few things that keeps me going. Or will it get me first? XD

I was just looking at the next Econ assignment and it looks like a tough one. I mean there are so many parts that I think this one should be worth a lot oh points. I feel cold and yet warm.

Today I think for the most part I got Estate done. And I just finished up Phil. I leave it in Gods hands now what happens to it. I think I really did try this time to put some effort into it. But somehow I feel as though I am still lacking. I do feel tired. Maybe it's a chance to take some rest. But taking breaks do help. Gives me a new perspective on things. But this week seems so long. It actually is.

It's funny how I was seeking the phone and tomorrow it mentions it. We shall see. The weekend I fear. But it should be fine. It will be here soon enough and you can worry about it then. It all comes soon enough. Care about the things that are here already before you pass you by as well. I am kind of sad that the phone is chiped. I must be careful. Cherish when it was whole.

Cruel Intensions; Nutter

Now it's not doing what you think is good, but doing what you think is bad but might be good for you. The do on to others as you would want them to do to you does not apply well here as treat others as they treat you. I know honestly no one would do that for me. Or least not even consider or go out of their way to. But considering that eh did miss out on not one but two quizes and I totally failed on one of them. And yet we don't get any resultes on any of them.

I can't say I like the pop beat for Mirotic. Anyways, at least they are pleasent to look at. Goodness they look so good. But other than that, the day doesn't look too well. I so need a smoothie to sooth things today. I feel like I should go quick grab one but I know I can't drink in Phil. And then after Phil I want to peep at the BCIS talk. Oh what to do. Decesion decession decesions.

I want a netherball. I'm not sure what it is, but something a hermit crab would live in. I needed to listen to decesions again because I wans't sure what to do about em. But it gave me a clear answer. But I want to make sure I do it right or properly. I will continue this at a latter moment.

Ajahn Beef, Because I Can

Ha, is that not the most harlirious thing I have read all day given that today has only started. But is there a reason why my pick jacket kinda smells like fishie? I'm trying to remember if I did or did not bring this one to fishing. But now that I think about it. I think I did. Now I am left without my blue and white jacket. I really do feel like a big pink jet puffed marshmellow. Oh well. No matter because those who mind don't matter and the ones that don't mind matter. And that's how it is. There seems to be no apreciation. Or at least prof is kind off in his own thing. guess can't go talk to him unless he talkes to you. Else he too is also in his own little world.

It's funny I feel as if this has all happened before. Metting ema nd doing this presentation. Or is this all to vivid in my imagination? I am not sure what to make out of it. DBSK has a new don't. Can't say I like the lyrics, but it has this really grovy tune.

Okay it's super offocial. Eh does know freaking everyone and it hit the all mighty 400. You telling me mr busy didn't add them all ye right lol Can't be that possibly popular, can? If so then I need to discover eh secret. We'll see about that.

Eh finally called. I didn't really expect it, but if eh wants to play then we shall play. You can't out play mi =P I rule this game =P I'll show you. You will see. Lesley Roy- Unbeautiful is an interesting song. You know after talking to em it seems the weekend won't be that bad. I maybe able to shop on my own with mummy and even work. How beautiful. See how things just work out seemingly effortlessly.

I am very disapointed about my paper. There's still a chance, but still it's absolutly atrochious. I have time tomorrow to work on it. And I have Estate HW.


"This is me, I am unchangable"

I want to look good naked

Scope:
You seem to be always in the right place at the right time and there is no need to feel regret or shame about things that have happened in the past. Turn negative experiences into lessons for a better future. Even though you may not be able to change a certain situation, you can at least change your reaction to the situation.

This is not something of sort I wanted to know. But it reasures me of something. It's something I really beleive in and try to live not just today by it, but of everyday.

Taro:
Whatever you’re trying to do, the High Priestess and the Hermit slow you down and encourage you to take a break from your relentless onward course. Why? So that you can move forward all the more quickly tomorrow! You need to think hard about your approach and reflect on your working methods and relationships. Don’t worry – in the long run you’ll gain from this slowing of the pace...

I really do hope this is true. I do fell really tired of late. I really do want to get things done, but it doesn't seem to be going my way. I will try tonight.


For some reason this picture caught my eye. Maybe because he's really cute XD but can't go worng with a little eye candy. Who knew he's malaysian. He does have a really pretty face. So today got a call from Ian. I do owe him a call. I will call him back tomorrow. And also finally got a responce from one of the malays. Think it's the one I met. Either way. Have so many things to do. Oh what to do first.. So lets list them out...

Econ graphs
Estate Homework
Study for Mkrting
Phil paper 6
Malay powerpoint
Credit Default Swap

Now that they are listed and I can see them. It doesn't look so bad after all. Seems like just minor things. There is more to the list. But these are just the nagging things. And now to put them in order later.

Perfectly Coiffed Hair

... so was it really studying? I guess it's possible. It does kind of make sence if it was testing all week. And eh's really feeling bad about it. But can't keep on coming up with excuses. Really can't. It did releive some stress, some concern. Either way it's okay. I am glad I took some action. But I need to be very careful when talking to em.

Lay and Lie

I really do need an angel like him to save me XD

So I read an interesting artical on the words Lie and Lay. From my understanding, if there's an object, then you can Lay it down like Lay and egg. But the action itself you can Lie down, or Lie in the sun. Sure it sounds simple enough. Now it's only a question how long can I remember it. And what else, so I read my scopre for tomorrow and it's pretty much telling me to do this presentation. But I am feeling a bit weezie about it. Who am I doing this for? Who am I trying to impress? For awhile I thought it might be for him. But on second thought it's for prof and for myself in a way. But the fear of screwing this up crept up on me. Even if I did, sure no one will really say anything. We shall see how this works out. It just accured to me that Jermy has a malay restraunt. And hmm what else. I need to mainly get econ HW donw tomorrow for the most part.

I Will Fix This

When you Screw up and No One saids Anything
Expereince is what you get when you don't get what you wanted.
Brick walls are there to give us a shance to show how badly we want something, they are there to stop the other people.
If your index finger is shorter than your fourth finger, it means you had a lot of testosterone in utero.
Loyalty is a two way street.
You can't get there alone, beleive in good karma.
Tell the truth, Be earnest, Apologize when you screw up, Focus on others, not just yourself.
Don't bail, the best gold is at the bottom of barrels of crap.
Brick wall lets us show out detication, to seperate the ones who don't really want to achieve.
Don't complain, just work harder.
Be good at something, it makes you valuable
Find the best in everyone, no matter how long you have to wait.
Be prepared. Luck is preparation meets opportunity.

So I watched the Last Lecture. It was interesting. It had some slow parts. But overall not bad. I kinda expected something more out of it. But I went away from it with some good points. I don't feel like talking to Lulu today, she's just being nosie.

Today talked to someone today. Someone I didn't really expected for like 40minutes and I was wondering how I was going to use up that hour I had left and there it goes. See how things have a way of taking care of itself. But not like I couldn't roll over thoes minutes either. But I am proud of the way I handled it. I could have turned all jeckel and hyde on it but I am glad I didn't. At least the old me might have. Give them something they don't expect. Give them the last thing they expect and leave them speechless. Don't give them the honor of being what they expect. be the unexpected and catch them off guard. I am full of surprises. It maybe the sweetest kind of revenge. Regret. It's something I wanted at the beginning. It has been in the making for a long time. But it has finally come full circle has it? Has my pacients paid off finally? Has the seeds I planted a long time ago finally becomes something? We shall see. Finally got a real sorry. Made my makeup run. So mean. So what to do? There is nothing to do. At least it's not my concern. I got the global business thing to be more concerned about it more than that. That will work itself out.

Tomorrow I look forward to. I know I have not been eating much. But tomorrow should be fun. Get to go to Target and look for coat with simmy and get to go home. But looking at this Econ and it's not working with me right now. I really can't for the life of me remember how it works. Gosh darn it. Out of all the notebooks I can leave behind I leave the one I need. This is so not good, my back has been hurting and I am not sure from what really. I mean I sit like I usually do. But the pain.. Maybe I really do need to sit up more straight before I really do curel up into a shrimp. And at the same time I am getting really tired. But I am slowly getting stuff done. This global business stuff is really starting to bother me. I mean as of right now I know nothing. Either way it will work itself out. Get some rest self, goodnight.

Spitty

Word of the day comes from KSTP weather guy describing todays weather as spitty as to wet fluries of snow. Today finally get some decent amount of visible snow. Okay so that image isn't flurries. But at least there's snow. Okay this one is better. A wee bit creepy with the spider. Finall got an email from Polacco and with this week full of bad news, finally some good news. Got a better than expected grade on the second test. There's still hope. Means I need to get started on rewriting test answers. I look outside and I can see snow flurries. It's nice. It has a nice calming effect. Sadly library is not open today, was going to do Eviews. There's always tomorrow. It's no nice outside, it's snowing so much. Don't have much to say now. Time passes by so quickly. It be all over before you know it. I know I am scaring myself right now. And maybe it's the fear that keeps me on my toes.

Loveless, Hopeless

I don't beleive in Love (not the romantic kind at least). It's the sone that's on Leno right now performed by Dito. I'm myself in my room since roomy went off to a party of some sort. One of the few times I get to be in here myself. So I need to be greatful for this time. This is more of less how I feel right now. More or less indifferent. Loveless, Hopeless. Seems to be a more appropiate title. The nail NYC is so bad. I don't even want to use it again and I am so tempted to toss it. Maybe I should to save myself some trouble and time. I just noticed that no one has made fun of Obama at all. No one seems to have any kind of dirt on him. Or do they dare not to say anything bad in fear of being called a raciest.

Omg these look so good. Makein me so hungie. I am so ready for Christmas. Snickerdoodles should be tasty. The ones at Cub are nummies. But can't say the bee crackers are tasty. Thoes are just bad.

They really add color. It's nice. It's so uncomfortable to type here, but it keeps me warm.. Maybe it will help me to get this done faster. So tired, so tired for now apparent reason. Just dwelling over something I am not doing anything about. Goodnight self.

Are you Pondering what I am Pondering?

On the side note, I was going through photos and it just amde me realize how they have such bad tastes in guys. I mean they are really fuglie. I guess they could be really nice or something, but they are just hidious. That type of guy usually has some sort of asian fetish. But is it so worng? To have an perference? I mean like I do as well. But it's not like I can't apreciate a good looking cracker and I would find all asians attractive. Because they are not. Something to ponder about. For some reason it really disgustes me. I mean I would be fine if she at least found a good looking one, but he's not even close. It really makes me sick, really sick.

I know I am not doing well. Lord help me. Help me find the way again. Less thinking and more doing, pause to ponder and then keep going. Make frequent stops if you need, but never stop moving. So help me God.

Disapointment

My God, how did I manage to do so poorly? Today is really a bad day. I feel like with drawing from everything and just have everyone leave me the fak alone to do my work. I really need to get on top of things now. I guess it's a usual, better late than never. But it hurts, it really hurts. Is it punishment for douting? Is it punishment for not following through on my end? Or is it temptation? It maybe all of the above. I pray to my Lord for guidance in these dark time. May I find the light and be what you want me to do. In my darkest times, it was you that got me through it. I hope and pray for the same. I dare not to ask for me. But in desperate times, I need to have faith and follow your guidance.

I know I have failed you, I know I have let you down. But give me a chance. I know I can do great things for you. Please give me another chance. I will not disapoint you. I promise you that. Help me find the strength to get through this.

Loss

Taro - The cards of Death and Temperance indicate a rupture or a loss that will cause you great pain.

Scary eh? I have once agaon few words to day. Maybe it's because of the cold or the chill in the air. Who knows maybe later there be a renew sense of my surroundings later. For now lets wash it away and rest on it.

Evil

Well at least that answers my question. It's not exackly what I expected, but it's a good thing.

So gey pong likes pink. He's so gey he don't even like boys and keeps insisting on the gey bar.

Spiffy

I have concluded today that I decided to take a different turn and to take a step back from what I am doing to gather myself to find out what I am doing. I am starting to get back into drama. It's surely much better than reality. But I can't live there always. But it's nice to get away sometimes. I don't have much to say today, I have many things troubleling me today so I wanted to do somethinga little bit different. In the morning I will get back on task. So many things to do and so little time. I feel very disapointed and such a failure. Either way it's time to go now. Goodnight self.

Rediculous

Well I guess I wasn't listening or I wasn't thinking that going to a conference that's for like 3 days wasn't it. Can take that time off to go to that thing. Well poo on him. At least the phone worked today. So at least I know there should be at least no technical problems with it for now. Else I don't know what was wrong with it. But right now I am really feeling really adjured. Really bothered. I really do not like sitting here. But not like I have much of a choice. I really do feel like moving or at least sleeping on it. But I willa fter I get through this chap and then over the equation for Estate and call it a night. It's still early I know. But I don't feel like I have gotten anything done. I am so troubled. What to do. This usually helps. Maybe I do really need to move. And I also feel the need to clean up. I am feeling really stressed out right now. So lets try to get this all done and get it over with. It will all soon be over. I can feel myself freaking out. Soon soon it will all before you know it. I dont' want you to regret anything. I know if I can get the tough stuff down tonight, the memorizing can happen tomorrow in the morning and I snag some candy. After tomorrow things will be better. I am starting to keep on top of things better. Even to my surprise got Econ started and graphs all punched out and marketing notes punched out as well. I am just nice enough to share. No harm, no loss. I think I maybe did try to start this too soon or maybe try to do too much at one time. I need to do something different. The marathing studing doesn't work very well when I start to break down and start to freak out. I need to go back to what works.

Such arragant people. Don't even think or do any research before they spout out stuff. I mean to get it all taken away? What have you lost? You don't even freaking know then how can you say you have lost anything? Investment? You know the dangers of stock and there are no garentees and it could all disapear over night. What has Abama done to you to make you spu such posperious skum. I think I have more than given up on people. I'll just keep to myself but doens't mean I don't love you all unconditionally just as long as none of you get too close, I do bite after all *chomp* I will just admire you from afar and strive to be all I can be in what ever value I see in you. And take away what I can. For now give it a rest. Lets see if you can even get in and out before 2. Goodluck, send lots of love. All very unconditional.

omg that's too funny. I am really starting to think he is really gey he has become a fan of Mark? lolz omfg... really is too funny, you really can't make this stuff up. Just halarious. Oh well. It's all good, goodnight my dear.

Mirotic

Ha lets talk about my new obsession. It's really starting to catch on like a virus or a bug. Infection I tell ya. They are really smooth and if that's really them singing live then they are very good at what they do. We'll see how long this last. I really do admire them, think I can be cool like that? hehe working on it. For now I gotta work on what I need to do or at least plan it out so I don't end up staying up all night and day working on this.

And omg Ashely, the one from UMD and really liked King Author, omg.. she really has ballooned up. What the heck. It's hard to say what happened. And that suddenly reminds me of Nikki, wonder how she is doing. But for the life of me I can't remember her last name. Oh well who knows maybe it will come to me. Omg I love this song. Okay so now it doens't help that my back is starting to hurt now. But soon it be all over, but I want to get at least the concept down so the rest of the time will be pure memorization and recognition. But the math part I need to understand it above anything else. So the phone issue. Well either tomorrow I figure out something is deathly worng, or I chew him out lol So either way it's going to be fine. Rain has such a boyish look this time around. It's the boyish haircut. Either way, strive to be like them. Oh well I do kinda feel better that I did finish phill, but not disguession. So maybe I should finish that up first. Or now. Oh ick lolz bump into a fuglie pict of oh ickies, it's a sign to get off lol But anyways, got some what disgussion finished or at least done for today. Just so fuglie and that's not only the wrose part, even more fuglie inside and out. Funny enough ice_is_hot is not that bad from that angle. Oh dear I don't like what it has to say about tomorrow how I won't get much done.

Anyways I got a feeling won't be showing up for class. After all this isn't a class that's worth showing up for. Either way I don't have time this week to play note taker. At least not till after wednessday aka doomsday. Well seee how far I get. I don't like what I am doing, but so many things right now are bothering me especially not getting econ done. I want to try to dance like DBSK, thoes moves it is possible to follow along since they do so many live shows.

For now lets try to get some rest just like oh my goodness XD Get some rest self, no one will take care of you so you must take care of yourself and give yourself what you need at the same time punish yourself, to teach and train. I have been dealing with him much better now days. If it's anything important, there are ways, it all depends on how badly you want it. So one more time and it's time to go. They are just nice to look at and to play with. Anything else will just cause you to stry from the path. I have already strayed, so I need to get back on track my dear.

Phone I will see if it's a sign or maybe there really is a problem. I haven't been here for this long in a long time. I am just troubled today. Hopefully things be better in the morning, sleep well.

Tummie

So the tummie isn't feeling very well today and I haven't been blogging or anything for the weekend. I been very frustraited about my skin this week, but it seems to have gotten better. Now only if I wasn't so oilie. I been stressing about not getting things done and I paralizes me to the point where I can't do it anymore. I know I am freaking out and I fear the failure. But fir sure at this rate I will fail if I don't do anything about it. I am in pain. I want to do something but I feel and fear it maybe too late and I am so tired. I know it's the stress that is tiring me out. I still have econ to do and I haven't even done it yet. I feel like I should skip this assingment. But I also have work to do on finding answers for previous mgmt test. I was slightly bothered by cu goong. No comment on the scope today ^^ I got issues. But nothing I can't handle. I want to take some time to think.

Stupid boys. Got a call from the arse today. But I don't think it was meant to be, by the time I heard the phone it was because it was a missed call. Do I don't know, maybe he hung up after the first ring and changed his mind. I was right there, don't know how I could miss it. But then agian it wasn't the first time. Also missed jerks call to but it's not like I didn't try, just wasn't meant to be. Don't try to controll anything. Things will be as they should be. Things have been unsetteling. I am not sure why, Things have not been going so well. Somethings you just have to take care of yourself. Hopefully as long as I try, things will be better.