Monday, July 31, 2017

Weary

July. 31, 2017
Today you’re going to be rather unsure about your choices and decisions in matters of the heart, dear mel… The Magician brings a breath of fresh air, either in the shape of an unforeseen encounter or another event that opens new perspectives for you. Seize this opportunity in order to banish any feelings of uncertainty that are a source of anxiety for you. There is no good reason why you should torment yourself with all these questions! 




Not sure why the drafts are not saving. Can only guess that it maybe has no title or connection is sketchy. Eating more today but feeling bloaty. Crackers were not bad but also not very good. Should have stuck with just 2. Today is pretty calm as well. Moments of slight pamtic over issues but got it together and hopeful it doesn't come back again. Else there is a longing for purpose and just waiting for something to happen or to be easy when it's the right time or the feeling of wanting to do something. It never seems to ever arrive. Things getting old and moldy. Not like it tastes better. Got to find a way to toss a few things but it get harder as more are around more often. Doesn't mean it does still need to happen. What you saving it for?


Week 2, Day 1 of the calm. Just feels no tired of the worrying. I don't see myself doing this and see myself bombing this. How long can this be advoided? Been getting mixed signals but best best is that it's going to be hard and your are not good with multiple choice anyways. That's basically what butchered you on the ethics exam was the trick questions. Else the essays were not that bad maybe if you spent more time on. Only has been one day and there's so much buildup on scalp. There's so much I don't think I can keep it in my head. Just keep going over it. It has to stick. Don't want to be here forever. Big chick's comment makes me worried of what she thinks I do. TG is a little too helpful. Be so screwed beyond screwed without. Like you said, not sure if worth being around without.

Really the only one if the way is yourself. Could have been having fun all these weekends but don't due to the things think need to do but don't do. You are the only one holding yourself back. Think and  vomit to doing. Wi ever get to the point that has gone through the foods at home or will there always be something expiring or going bad? The cheese wiz was sure not as tasty as I recalled it was. Only buy things to accompany things to be eaten. Drink the tea been saving. Not like be around much longer to drink it. Drag the books around with you. Peek through it when you can and skim or slip steams not sure of. Can't test ya on everything. 

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