Outlook Research

I should have wrote something before, but I can't really if I did or not. I just remembered to do some research. The pay seems low and more complicated for a non chinese speaker like myself. Not sure if it's something I want to get myself into or even can. It's like a defalited balloon now knowing what I know. There are many things I know I want to try, but I know for some reason I want to end up here unless I can have it better there. But I lack in skill sets. Trying to imagin how good or crapy things can be. So many tedious tasks and that tooth chip is still bothering me.

It's not really that bad, or maybe that's what I like to think so I don't feel so bad. The events of last week was really bad. Things could have been planned better, but you just got to go with it. I can sit here and worry and not be excited about anything. I miss the excitment when I get an idea and go forth to do it reguardless because I knew I could make it work. Can I still do that? I am more hessatent and try to make do with less. I still want the passion.